How Happy I Am

There is this guy in my life that makes me so very happy right now. I find myself wanting to lay next to him in an endless cuddle. With every passing day I come to realize how special he is to me as he fills me with the kind of joy and happiness that is only available with the union of two individuals that are so compatible in the sense of everlasting friendship and love.

This message is for you baby. Thank you for making my life seem special and worthwhile.

--Joshua

Current Gay DVDs

Current Gay DVDs

ITIL: Information Technology Infrastructure Library

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Check out Bad Boys for true stories of gay bathhouses, tearooms, etc. (good read) ... Also check out Civil Wars ... it's about gay marriages

I love to laugh

ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Could We Start Again, Please?

MARY MAGDALENE

I've been living to see you.
Dying to see you, but it shouldn't be like this.
This was unexpected,
What do I do now?
Could we start again please?
I've been very hopeful, so far.
Now for the first time, I think we're going wrong.
Hurry up and tell me,
This is just a dream.
Oh could we start again please?

PETER

I think you've made your point now.
You've even gone a bit too far to get the message home.
Before it gets too frightening,
We ought to call a vote,
So could we start again please?

ALL

I've been living to see you.
Dying to see you, but it shouldn't be like this.
This was unexpected,
What do I do now?
Could we start again please?
I think you've made your point now.
You've even gone a bit too far to get the message home.
Before it gets too frightening,
We ought to call a vote,
So could we start again please?
Could we start again please? (Repeat 5 times)

MARY MAGDALENE

Could we start again?

Looking at the week ahead ...

I'm not finding it quite as hard to do without the gay.com ball and chain attached to my leg as I did in my first attempt at leaving gay.com forever. One of the reasons seems to be that the withdrawl symptoms do not seem quite as harsh as they were the first time. The other reason is because now that I've gotten myself off the mind-altering drugs that my doctor thought I needed my mind seems clear and focused. This week I plan on using this strength of mind to more clearly identify the differences in Joshua's character. Even though Joshua is young and innocent, these traits need to have clear and distinct characteristics. Hopefully I will have Joshua and Russel done by weeks close. I look forward to the three-day weekend after this week is done.

Weekend in Review

This was a fun weekend. The highlight was going to the Civic Center (http://www.civiccenter.org) in Des Moines, IA to see a SOLD OUT showing of Jesus Christ Superstar. Even though it is not as good as the DVD version directed by the same guy, it was entertaining.

Finished With Gay.com (Again!)

I'm done with gay.com and the people on there once again. No one there that I want to be friends with wants to be friends with me. However I wonder how long I can really stay gone! Last time only lasted a few days. My email is chasquad@hotmail.com but I guess if anyone really ever wanted to chat with me then I would not have left.

Quotes Twisted Gay

"For the last couple of months, Senator Rumson has suggested that being President of this country was, to a certain extent, about character. And although I've not been willing to engage in his attacks on me, I've been here three years and three days, and I can tell you without hesitation being President of this country is entirely about character.

For the record, yes, I have an account on gay.com, but the more important question is "Why don't you, Bob?" Now this is an organization whose sole purpose is to provide a service for gays and lesbians to hook-up, so it naturally begs the question, why would a senator, his party's most powerful spokesman and a candidate for President, choose to not hook-up with his fellow men? Now if you can answer that question, folks, then you're smarter that I am, because I didn't understand it until a few hours ago.

America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship. You've gotta want it bad, cause it's gonna put up a fight. It's gonna say, "You want gay sex? Let's see you acknowledge a man whose abs make your dick swell, who's standing center stage and stripping for a group of young studs at the peak of his manhood that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the thought of yours." You want to claim this land as the land of the free? Then the symbol of your country cannot just be a pride flag. The symbol also has to be one of it's citizens exercising his right to use that flag as a cum towel. Now show me that, defend that, celebrate that in your bedrooms. Then you can stand up and sing about the land of the free.

I've known Bob Rumson for years. And I've been operating under the assumption that the reason Bob devotes so much time and energy to shouting at the rain was that he simply didn't get laid. Well I was wrong. Bob's problem isn't that he doesn't get laid. Bob's problem is that he can't fell it!

We have serious problems to solve, and we need serious people to solve them. And whatever your particular problem is, I promise you Bob Rumson is not the least bit interested in solving it. He is interested in two things, and two things only: making you afraid of anal sex, and telling you who's to blame for it. That, boys and gentlemen, is how you win erections. You gather a group of young, horny, hot studs who know what a good time is, and you talk to them about anal sex, and ass play and oral sex, and you wave an old photo of the President's boyfriend having anal sex with a staff member and you scream about orgasms! -- you tell them he's not to blame for their lack of sex in life. And you go on television and you call him a whore.

Josh Boxer has done nothing to you, Bob. He has done nothing but put himself through school, represent the interests of gay men everywhere, and lobby for the safety of our barebacking. You want a character debate, Bob? You better stick with me, 'cause Josh Boxer is way out of your league.

I've loved two men in my life. I lost one to AIDS. And I lost the other 'cause I was so busy keeping my job, I forgot to do my job. Well that ends right now.

Tomorrow morning the White House is sending a bill to Congress for it's consideration. It's White House Resolution 455, an energy bill requiring a twenty percent reduction of the emission of fart gas over the next ten years. It is by far the most aggressive stride ever taken in the fight to reverse the effects of global smelling. The other piece of legislation is the crime bill. As of today, it no longer exists. I'm throwing it out. I'm throwing it out and writing a law that makes sense. You cannot address crime prevention without getting rid of anal beads and water-based lube. I consider them a threat to national security, and I will go door to door if I have to, and fuck everyone I see, but I'm gonna convince Americans that I'm right, and I'm gonna get the lube.

We've got serious problems, and we need serious people. And if you want to talk about character, Bob, you'd better come at me with more than a pride flag and a gay.com account. If you want to talk about character and American values, fine. Just tell me where and when, and I'll show up. This a time for serious people, Bob, and your fifteen minutes are up.

My name is Andrew Shepherd, and I AM the President."

-- President Andrew Shepherd - "The American President"

Some good gay movies that I like

When Will the Rain End

The sky is murky and grey,
and the children are not at play;
Forever seems today,
as my patience withers away.

How I long for something to do,
to occupy my time adue;
As I begin to think of you,
I realize that I want to spend my time with you.

--Josh Boxer

What's it's Name?

This guy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar. "But what the heck," he says, "I really want a drink."

When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the customer, "What's the name of your penis?"

The customer says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink."

The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your penis. Mine for instance is called 'Nike,' for the slogan, 'Just Do It.' That guy down at the end of the bar calls his 'Snickers,' because 'It really Satisfies."

The customer looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over. The customer asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of your penis?"

The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX."

The thirsty customer asks, "Why Timex?"

The fella proudly replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!"

A little shaken, the customer turns to the fella on his right, who is sipping a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you call your penis?"

The man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because 'Quality is Job 1.' " Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford, lately?"

Even more shaken, the customer has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his penis. Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my penis is 'Secret.' Now give me my beer."

The bartender begins to pour the customer a beer, but with a puzzled look asks, "Why secret?"

The customer says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"

100 Reasons to be Gay

1. You truly don't care who Julia Roberts is sleeping with.
2. You understand the difference between 43 brands of imported vodka.
3. You can call anyone "honey" including pets.
4. You know someone who definitely was in the emergency room with Richard Gere and the gerbil.
5. You understand the immense importance of good lighting.
6. You can be at a crowded disco the size of two football fields and still spot a toupee.
7. You can tell a woman you love her bathing suit, and truly mean her bathing suit.
8. You can explain the nuances between steady date, boyfriend and lover.
9. You really have "been there, done that."
10. Your women friends will tell you everything you want to know about their boyfriends. And that means everything.
11. You're the only type of male who gets to say "fabulous."
12. You can have naked pictures of men you don't know in your home.
13. You can have naked men you don't know in your home.
14. You know how to handle the telephone like a Stradivarius.
15. You understand why the good Lord invented spandex.
16. You understand why the good Lord didn't intend everyone to wear it.
17. You know how to get back at just about everyone. And have.
18. You know that the most important part of a party's decor is the catering staff.
19. You only wear polyester when you mean to.
20. You can smile to let someone know you can't stand them.
21. You can freeze a troll from 20 feet away.
22. You're good pals with women other people can't stand.
23. You've always got an opinion.
24. You've read the book, seen the movie, done the musical.
25. You know how to dress strategically.
26. Your car has an amusing female name.
27. You're the only one at your high school reunion who looks a lot better than you did in high school.
28. You've got at least one framed picture of a pet.
29. If your mattress could talk, it would be Joan Rivers.
30. You know that sex complicates things. So?
31. You know that being called a "cheap slut" isn't actually an insult.
32. There's a married guy somewhere who is terrified of you.
33. Nobody tells you what to do in bed...unless you tell them what to tell you.
34. You have a medicine chest stocked for any occasion.
35. You have at least one movie musical on video.
36. You're not embarrassed to sing in a piano bar.
37. You're embarrassed by people who sing in piano bars.
38. You never hold a grudge for longer than a decade or two.
39. You know how to make an entrance.
40. You know when to make an exit.
41. You worry about people you don't even know - like Liza Minnelli.
42. You choose the most fabulous greeting cards.
43. You know how to program your VCR.
44. You've got sunscreen at every conceivable SPF level.
45. You have a cologne display worthy of Bloomingdales.
46. You understand, viscerally, Joan Crawford.
47. Some of your best friends are your ex lovers.
48. You know when to play dumb.
49. You know what to do for a hangover.
50. Yes, you do have a condom.
51. You've called someone "girlfriend" who is neither a girl nor a friend.
52. One or more of the following apply to you:
a) You adore Judy Garland
b) You hate Judy Garland
c) You hate people who adore Judy Garland.
d) You hate people who hate Judy Garland.
e) You don't give a damn about Judy Garland.
f) Who is Judy Garland?
53. You can supply the last names to the following list:
a) Bernadette
b) Chita
c) Barbra
54. You made Donna Summer a star.
55. You made Donna Summer a has-been.
56. Tanning salons were invented for you.
57. You've made sunbathing a performance art.
58. You know when the party's over.
59. You know where to go after the party's over.
60. You're fearless about fighting the elements, especially gravity.
61. When you hear "a stitch in time saves nine" you think of
a) Your grandma
b) Your face lift
c) John Wayne Bobbit
62. You know that pigs and bears are not necessarily rural wildlife.
63. Your roommate can be your roommate and not your "roommate."
64. You know that referring to someone as "a real lady" isn't necessarily a compliment.
65. Your favorite dinner accessory may also be your dinner companion.
66. If your cat is a female, you swear it's a lesbian.
67. If your cat is a male, you swear it's a lesbian.
68. You sing along heartily with songs that make most females cringe, like "Stand by your man".
69. You've been to a bris, a barmitzvah, a christening, a first communion and too many weddings and you have a carefully considered evaluation of the food after each.
70. You'll never have to hear your mother complain about your wife.
71. A two-seater convertible seems perfectly practical to you.
72. You have a favorite Disney character and it's usually a nasty one.
73. You've left someone totally speechless.
74. You've shaved something other than your face.
75. All your friends do not have to "get along".
76. You have large collection of anniversary pictures. They may be with different guys, however.
77. Your love handles are actually used as such.
78. When someone turns his back on you, you actually consider it an opportunity.
79. You've got a large assortment of movie-star biographies.
80. You've got the most interesting coffee table books.
81. You know where to find a meat rack and it ain't in your kitchen drawer.
82. You have a sexual persuasion with its own flag.
83. At some moment in your life you've envisioned having back-up girls.
84. You know your enemies.
85. After a workout at the gym, you feel like a new man. And he's right there in the shower.
86 You're Barbra Streisand's biggest fan.
87. You know that Barbra Streisand's biggest fan is Barbra Streisand.
88 Not only have you added spice to your life - sometimes you've added side dishes.
89. You know that "small talk" can be about spirituality or politics, and "important issues" can be about hair.
90. You've actually lived out some of your fantasies.
91. Unlike most straight women, you have no problem being treated solely as a sex object.
92. You have no doubts about the accuracy of the Kinsey Report.
93. You know, by heart, every line in:
a) All about Eve
b) The Rocky Horror Picture Show
c) Your face
94. You are ALWAYS ready for your close-up.
95. You have 412 ways to tell someone to get lost. 136 are non-verbal.
96. You can lip-sync to at least one Supreme's song.
97. You have a carefully selected Yiddish vocabulary.
98. Even if you're in Kansas, you're not in Kansas anymore.
99. You know exactly how many martinis it takes.
100. When throwing a party, you know how to put out quite a spread. Sometimes after the party too.

After Thoughs, Why I Cry

Even as I wonder,
about times gone by;
I think and ponder,
why I cry.

I try to hold onto,
things that matter no more;
Because I don't want to,
be lonely anymore.

-- Josh Boxer 1/13/2004

Tired of Gay.com

Hi All :-)

I guess if you are reading this then you have noticed that I have not been in the gay.com Iowa room lately. I did some thinking and based on 4.5 years on gay.com looking for a real flesh & bone friend(s) has turned up "fruitless" then it is time to do better things with my time. I do intend on sneaking back in the room ever so often but every day as I used to do. I'm usually not the type of person to give up on a dream but if I were to keep persuing this one then I will miss out on other dreams of mine that have been put on the back burner so to speak. I feel as though I have tried very hard to find real friends on gay.com over the years. My final attempt was last night when I was asking for information on bars and where to go and after a nice chat in the main room no one actually wanted to accompany me anywhere. It's ok, I'll get over it in time. It's important to know that I never asked anyone for sex. I did have a teasing problem in the main room at times but that was quickly cleared up in pvts. I have had a few good laughs on gay.com but mostly, as I reflect on the last few months, gay.com has caused me much heartbreak and many nights crying myself to sleep. I hope this will be a positive decision that I have made. I have been on the Internet for only 5.5 years now. I did take a full year off of gay.com once before and I'm sure that I can do it again. Thanks to everyone who did consider me a "chat friend." And for those of you whom I annoyed, I am sorry.

I hate goodbyes ... so ... Joshua_IC signing off until next time ....